top of page

10 Things Your Successful Friends Have Gone Without

  1. Gossip, Seclusion, & Being Mean

One critical thing your most successful thing your friends have gone without is gossip, seclusion and being mean.

They know, at least unconsciously, that building influence is essential to success. Even if they are shy, introverted, and prefer seclusion, your most successful friends are building high-quality relationships. Your successful friends are focused on adding value to people’s lives.

Whether they are building people up, challenging them to grow and be their best self, or bringing people together, the emphasis is on serving others and adding value.

  1. Being Liked

Challenging people to grow and become their best self means enduring not being liked- at least in the short term — few people like being pushed outside their comfort zones.

Your most successful friends don’t feel a need to be ‘the boss everyone likes,’ the ‘the coolest parent,’ or ‘most liked co-worker.’ They are taking a long-term orientation toward adding value and remaining dedicated to helping others grow and reach THEIR dreams.

Your successful friends have a vision and know the next five moves they need to execute to get them where they want to go as well. They know how to concentrate their energy and time towards their goals and that this effort requires saying no.

Saying no does not earn them the affection or approval of people in their lives. Whether it is the friend’s invitation to a party or a co-worker’s appeal for help on a project, your successful friend knows their priorities and sticks to them, even if it means enduring not being liked.

  1. Partying Until Late at Night

The vast majority of high performing people get up early and execute a series of habits that get them charged with energy. Your successful friends aren’t staying out late partying and drinking. Instead, they enjoy a drink or two, enjoy building influence with people at the party, and then get to bed so they can get up and feel rested the next day.

  1. Being Free and Spontaneous

Who doesn’t love the joyful friend who can take off at the last minute for an adventure or party two states or time zones away?

Your thriving friends aren’t spontaneous and free. Sure, they may love to do a world tour with you, but they will need time to check-in and reflect first on how it will impact their ambitions.

High-performing people usually have strict routines and habits in place so they can laser their focus on the handful of priorities that are most important to achieving their goals.

They’re committed to achieving long-term goals with daily actions, so your successful friends can’t suddenly decide to stay up until dawn to watch the sunrise. They need to recharge their energy with a good nights sleep to work hard.

  1. Resenting the Game

Specific steps, skills, knowledge, and experience will make your vision a reality.

Your successful friends don’t resent the game involved with getting a book published, getting promoted up the career ladder, making partner, building a thriving business, or creating a loving and healthy family culture.

They not only don’t resent the game you need to play to reach success, but they’ve also read, watched, and listened to how other people have achieved the success they seek. Equipped with the inspiration, motivation, and a plan, they start acting immediately toward their goal.

It doesn’t matter if they’re shy and getting promoted requires building influence. Your successful friend grits her teeth and builds-up their skills at conversation, networking, and growing influence.

  1. An Empty Email In-box & Social Media Connection

Do you know that friend that is living their ideal life? They didn’t get there by keeping an ever empty email inbox and staying in contact on social media all the time.

Your most successful friends reserve the first morning hours of their day to work on getting their most important medium and long-term work done. Creativity requires energy, so they devout their full focus to the job that involves imagination and innovation each morning until ten or noon.

They don’t check their emails until lunchtime, and they don’t check in to social media until the afternoon or evening. Making progress each morning towards long-term goals and leveraging their best energy to creativity and imagination has enabled your friend to reach the success they now enjoy.

  1. Being Fun

Sure, your most successful friends could be tons of fun. It’s just that the place a value on working toward their dreams before fun. They understand that immediate and short term pleasure won’t get them where they want to go.

They’re giving up their week of holiday to write that book, execute their business plan, paint every day, take that course to increase their knowledge or skills, or build their new home by hand.

  1. Working Without a Break

Yes, you read that right. Your most successful friends are taking breaks at least every ninety minutes if not once an hour.

They take two to five minutes to get up and move, stretch, meditate, look at nature, walk outside, laugh with others at the coffee machine, or do some yoga.

When they sit back down, they set a specific goal for the next hour to an hour and a half of work. Before the next break, they analyze their performance. Did they meet their goal? Why or why not? The next time they sit down they work to improve their prod